I recently posted an article on Facebook and it got quite the lash back from people. I find lots of thing interesting and enjoy reading research. Now just because research is done, doesn’t mean it applies to all. Just because we do something, have an opinion, and share it, doesn’t mean we think everyone needs to do it OUR way. Yet I find people take things posted as a personal attack and feel the need to defend themselves and their opinion when anything is contrary to their beliefs. There are certain issues that I will go to bat for but there are also many things that I think there are several ways to do. For instance, there is ONE way to heaven and that is through Jesus. There are several ways to teach our kids how to read but how we each go about that may look different. Some may homeschool, public school, private school, private tutor and they may use phonics or whole language. I think they are all good options and may also depend on the child. There is no need for me to tell you that the way you are teaching your child to read is wrong just because my experience was different than yours. I hope that makes sense.
I saw this article someone posted. And then I saw this article. Now I know this will take some work on your part to read through these and once you do I have a few questions. Both of these women approach the same topic and their feelings toward it. After you read each article take the stance and attitude of the author and answer the following questions:
- How do you feel after reading each article?
- How do you feel toward your spouse when you have the attitude and feelings of the author?
- How do you treat your husband as a result of those feelings?
- What is the state of your mental health?
I once went to my counselor, yes I have one and have been to one throughout my life on different occasions. I walked in and told her that my kids were driving me nuts and that they never listen to me. She asked me how I felt when I thought of my kids that way and how I treated them. I responded that I felt mad, angry, short tempered, and irritable with my kids. She asked me if I always listen. Of course I do not. There are times when people have said things and I’ve been absorbed in something else. She then asked if my kids NEVER listen. Well, no there were plenty of times that they did listen. See it had to do with my focus and my attitude more so than my kids behavior. I could choose to be frustrated and annoyed or I could choose to be patient. My kids behavior will mostly likely be the same but I can be mad or joyful as I deal with it.
My point in relation to these articles is I can choose to be upset, angry, bitter, resentful, etc. or I can choose to see it differently. See no one asks me to keep the house clean, buy gifts, manage the kids etc. What would happen if I stopped doing those things? I imagine they would figure it, but they would handle it differently than I would. See my husband and I have very differently priorities and I don’t see that as a bad thing. We both tackle a problem in different ways. Sure if I hired a maid I would call several places and do the research and figure out the best price. Left to my husband he would call the first place and give it a try and if it worked great, if not he’d probably fire them and go to the next one.
I’m sure there will be lots of comments on this and some not so nice ones but my point is this. You can try, if you’d like, to change people and circumstances. You can be frustrated, bitter, and angry. You can also accept things and choose joy. It’s solely up to you. You cannot control others and I fully believe in what Charles Swindoll said:
What do you choose today?